Fears, resentments, tumults, all sorts of issues.
Wow, what a terrible, frustrating, bitter existence it was.
No, it was not life and that more abundantly. Not at all.
It was a wildness of going around and around, trying to fix everything, trying to maintain some sense of peace and serenity in a world which could so easily take it away.
The world did indeed continue to dominate me.
The AA cult lies to people, giving them the impression that working those "simple" steps will grant peace and serenity.
In reality, we end up tilling the soil, trying to perfect flesh which cannot be fixed.
We do need to be delivered from the bondage of self, but we cannot exit from the old without receiving a new, better self -- which is Christ, Himself.
The program tells people that they can create their own God, yet anything that we create is automatically tainted with ourselves once again. No peace, no restoration, no rest.
We need to know that every paid, every hurt, every setback in our lives has been fully paid for.
It is not enough for us to say "Oh well" to the hurts against us, and the hurting we have done to others.
We need to have an eternal satisfaction for ourselves, plus a deliverance from our fleshly nature, which holds onto grudges, which lusts for vengeance rather than resting in His promises to be a God to us.
He is greater than our understanding, and because of His greatness, we do not have to hold onto the lie that this world depends on us, or our thinking in some way. We know that He is for us, because He was against His Son, in that His Son became sin, that we would receive His righteousness and all blessings with it.
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