Monday, December 31, 2012

Bill W. Couldn't Quit Smoking

Bill Wilson was, is, and remains a fraud.

The man clamored for whisky at the end of his life.

The man was sober in name only. He smoked like a chimney.

He smoked like a trail of chimneys.

Toward the end of his life, he would agonize between whether to take a breath from an oxygen tank or drag a puff from his cigarette. The cigarette won.

My Mom was "addicted" to AA. She continued "working the steps" long after she stormed out of the  meetings. She left the rooms, but  the rooms never left her.

For all the Steps that she took in her life, for all the inventories that she worked, she never quit smoking by working the steps.

One day in 1984, the same year that Reagan won by a landslide against Walter Mondale, my mother got down on her knees and prayed:

"God, I have no faith in myself, and I have little faith in you. Please take away this addiction from me."

From that day on, she never smoked again. My father can attest to this. He quit smoking, too.

What really matters here is the following:

"Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the LORD unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts." (Zechariah 4: 6)

and

"It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life." (John 6: 63)

and

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Philippians 4: 13)

Instead of trying to make ourselves better, God wants us to give up trying altogether and let His life live through us. His grace gives us all the strength to say "No!" to sin, and "Yes!" to life and godliness (Titus 2: 11-12)

My mother did not trust her own efforts. She gave up and just asked God, and He came through for her. She never smoked again.

Yet she continued to "work the steps" for everything else in her life. She is now dead, having "taken her inventory" until the very end.

Bill W. couldn't quit smoking, but my mother did.

Too bad that she did not quit AA.

Quit AA. Receive the forgiveness of sins through Christ Jesus, and let His life reign in you, so that yo may reign in life (Romans 5: 17)

The Twelve Steps: "The Ministry of Condemnation"

"4And such trust have we through Christ to God-ward: 5Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God; 6Who also hath made us able ministers of the new testament; not of the letter, but of the spirit: for the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life." (2 Corinthians 3: 4-6)

I am learning more about this wonderful yet very integral truth. The Law, the Ten Commandments, were never given to justify man, but to bring man to the end of himself:

"Now we know that what things soever the law saith, it saith to them who are under the law: that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God." (Romans 3: 19)

Mouth stopped, standing guilty before God.

The Law was given to bring us to faith in Christ:

"23But before faith came, we were kept under the law, shut up unto the faith which should afterwards be revealed. 24Wherefore the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ, that we might be justified by faith. 25But after that faith is come, we are no longer under a schoolmaster." (Galatians 3: 23-25)

The Law is meant to kill us, to bring us to the end of ourselves, so that we can let the Spirit of God live through us.

The Twelve Steps is just a modern variation of the Ten Commandments, a set of demands on mankind which no one can keep.

The more dutifully someone tries to work this "simple program", the more complicated it gets. AA does not leave a set of rules for members to follow. "Self-centered", "dishonest", "self-seeking", "frightened" are so vague as to be meaningless. A life of taking your inventory every day brings forth a sin conscience, a sense within yourself that you have to watch your steps, make sure that you never fail.

Inevitably, this program turns people ino Pharisees or failures. The Pharisees take their inventory, yet more importantly they force you to take yours over and over. If they step out of line, the "newcomer" cannot say anything, because he is "new". Then there are the "failures", the growing number of people who end up in the meetings, realizing that they either cannot get a handle on their drinking, or they find that all the anger and fear and resentment cannot be wiped away.

The source of our problems does lie with ourselves, but the answer is not to die to self as much as to receive a new life, not just a new set of rules to live by, a set of rules which inevitably turns us back to ourselves, and we can do nothing about ourselves except cry out for a Savior.

This Savior wants to write his laws on our hearts and lead us naturally from within. This is the life that men and women seek, not a set of rules on the outside which can do nothing about the inside, but an inner life and leading from the inside which transforms the person from the outside.

The "old-timers" in AA meetings will go on and on about the fact that no one can work the next eleven steps "perfectly", but the impression one gets from the program, especially the warning which cautions "to drink is to die", turn those "Twelve Suggestions" into "Twelve Must Dos".

The Twelve Steps, like any other system, is a ministry of condemnation:

"7But if the ministration of death, written and engraven in stones, was glorious, so that the children of Israel could not stedfastly behold the face of Moses for the glory of his countenance; which glory was to be done away:" (2 Corinthians 3: 7)

The Law had a glory, but the glory is done away in Christ. Hebrews confirms this wonderful truth:

"For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, saith the Lord; I will put my laws into their mind, and write them in their hearts: and I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people:

"And they shall not teach every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the Lord: for all shall know me, from the least to the greatest.

"For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more.

"In that he saith, A new covenant, he hath made the first old. Now that which decayeth and waxeth old is ready to vanish away." (Hebrews 8: 10-13)

There was an Old Covenant, the Law of Moses with animal sacrifices to atone for sins (Exodus 20). Under the New Covenant, with the blood of Jesus Christ shed once and for all for all our sins, all we "have to do" is believe. And all the blessings of God flow in our lives, starting with righteousness, then peace, and finally joy (Romans 14: 17), and God the Father gives us all things with His Son, too (Romans 8: 31-32)






The Twelve Steps Brings the Curse of the Law

To be under any system of Law is to invite the curse into your life:

"For as many as are of the works of the law are under the curse: for it is written, Cursed is every one that continueth not in all things which are written in the book of the law to do them. 11But that no man is justified by the law in the sight of God, it is evident: for, The just shall live by faith." (Galatians 3: 10-11)

To live under law is to invite an impossible standard of living onto your life, one which no one can keep, and thus to invite the curse, for to live by the law leads a man to fall from grace (Galatians 5: 4)

I have read about the high incidence of suicide in AA meetings. One woman came to a meeting, but she was told to leave because she was drunk when she showed up. The woman committed suicide the next day. The woman who had asked her to leave was still feeling bad about, after sixteen  years.

The program requires people to "keep coming back", to affirm an identity which is both negative and destructive, one which diminished you as a person, teaching you

"9But now, after that ye have known God, or rather are known of God, how turn ye again to the weak and beggarly elements, whereunto ye desire again to be in bondage?" (Galatians 4: 9)

Any set of rule-keeping will bring a man back into a servile, infantile life. This life creates a life of weakness and poverty. Not just the high incidence of suicide, but the high incidence of poverty and sickness is quite discouraging, too. People do not drink, but the abundant life that people seek, that God gives, cannot be found in "working twelve steps."

Jesus came that we might have life, and that more abundantly (John 10: 10).

AA, Twelve Steps, brings a curse, brings poverty, illness, and death.

Let Jesus Christ give you His life, and let Him grant to you all the wonders of grace and righteousness that many seek, which God so freely gives.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

"Spiritual Experience"-- Give Me a Break!

Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all.
 
It is a blunt blasphemy for this guy to go on and on about "Father of Light". This phrase is one of many references out of the Bible, taken out of context, of course:
 
"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning." (James 1: 17)
 
This Father sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to die for our sins and give us His life. No greater gift could come our way:
 
"31What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? 32He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?" (Romans 8: 31-32)
 
These were revolutionary and drastic proposals, but the moment I fully accepted them, the effect was electric. There was a sense of victory, followed by such a peace and serenity as I had never known. There was utter confidence. I felt lifted up, as though the great clean wind of a mountain top blew through and through. God comes to most men gradually, but His impact on me was sudden and profound.(Big Book, pg. 14)
 
So, this is the "spiritual experience" of Bill W.?
 
Other sources suggest otherwise, based on the affronts which he endured from the pre-AA "Oxford Group" (From "The Orange Papers"):
 
"Bill supposedly vowed to resist such an anti-intellectual program to the bitter end, but within two weeks, under the influence of alcohol withdrawal, delirium tremens, and the hallucinogen belladonna and other drugs, Bill Wilson gave up his "innate, inquiring, rational mind", and "surrendered", and was "changed" into an irrational true-believer Oxford Group cult member who then went on to insist that all other alcoholics must also give up their reason, logic, and rational thinking."
 
He was coerced into believing all that he was told from these people. Following all the drugs and coercions, Bill W. gave into the Oxford Group. Like a true believer, he then pursued this program into a secular religion, with himself and the "Steps" in the center.
 
Bill W. used drugs then and he continued to smoke until he died from complications from Emphysema.
 
"Spiritual experience"? -- Give me a break!
 
 

AA and Suicide: The Untold, Most be Told Story

Suicide is an unspoken yet must be told reality in AA.

I have endured this wickedness personally.
15)
Blamethenile shared his personal account on YouTube. He compiled a number of stories about AA, death, and suicide.

Blamethenile then shared these statements:

"F---- him! Better him than me!"

"Love and tolerance is our code" so claim the people in AA -- as if!

"Too bad he couldn't get honest and work this simple program."

No one can get honest enough to undo the sense of condemnation which weighs down on every person. This statement, like many others, came out of the mouth of an "old-timer".

Stuffy, self-righteous Pharisee is more accurate. . .

"Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye compass sea and land to make one proselyte, and when he is made, ye make him twofold more the child of hell than yourselves." (Matthew 23: 15)

"Suicide is the ultimate form of self-centered selfishness".

In a clinical sense, yes. Focusing one oneself breeds depression, despair, and ultimately death if one does not receive Life and that more abundantly from Another (John 10: 10)

"Why didn't he call somebody? He had lots of phone numbers."

What's the point of calling people who have the same problems as you do, who throw at you the same garbage that makes you dirtier and down-and-out? As a member of CR, I would rather choke on a stick than talk to any of those people who were still wallowing around feeling sorry for themselves, convinced that stepping into recovery was a life-long processs.

"See?! This is what happens when you quit going to meetings and don't work the steps."

That is a load of B----------. I cannot count on enough fingers and toes the people whom I have met who stopped going to meetings and they did not drink. In so many AA meetings, someone ends up sharing about friends or acquaintances who have quit drinking, yet they do not go to meetings. I hear about these success stories, and they all take place outside of meetings.

As for those who say the program works, oftentimes they do not go to meetings anymore!

"I hope the new people here can see how serious this program is. It is a matter of life and death for everyone of us."

AA is a matter of life and death: life if you get out, and death if you stay.

"There but for the grace of God. . ."

AA people know nothing about the grace of God. They have no right, no reason, no nothing to be talking about "grace".

"This is what happens when you get involved with a newcomer." (said newcomer was present)

Blamethenile found this one the most odious, as do I:

"Some of us must die so that the rest of us can live."

Besides the fact that a troubled person takes his own life, and thus other struggling people can step up on the lost lives of  those who died, there is one Person who died, so that the rest of us can live:

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3: 16)

To think that anyone would dismiss His death and resurrection with the deaths of other people who were looking for something better. . .

"Not God"?-- Not a Chance

According to AA enthusiasts, Bill W.  advanced a program in which man would accept that he is "Not God".

Ernest Kurtz wrote a history of AA called "Not God".

Other sources suggest that Bill W. actually wanted to play god.

Henriette Sieberling, the lady who introduced AA #2 (Dr. Bob) to Bill W., wrote in a letter to Clarence Snyder:

"It looked for a while as if Bill Wilson would like to crowd God out. . "

About AA members, Henriette then claimed:

"who have  been denied so much of the real "bread" - & given the "stone" of Bill Wilson's designs."

Bill W. did not frequent his own fellowships, apparently:

"We will be closely knit -  even with his taking the money & trying to take  the book. I am sure he will need our pity  & compassion because he has put himself  apart from the real fellowship - "

"Apart from the fellowship". . . I guess it did not "work" for him.

Bill W. wanted to play God, in fact:

He imagines himself all kinds of things.
His hand "writes" dictation from a Catholic
priest, whose name I forget, from the 1600 period
who was in Barcelona Spain - again, he told
Horace Crystal**, he was completing the work
that Christ didn't finish, & according to Horace
he said he was a reincarnation of Christ.
Perhaps he got mixed in whose reincarnation
he was. It looks more like the works of the
devil but I could be wrong. I don't know what
is going on in the poor deluded fellow's mind.


The automatic writing nonsense that Bill W. engaged, I was taught to do the same folly. It's just crazy. The stupid things that people do when they listen to an "inner voice" if they are not identified with the Way, the Truth, and the Life.

"He was completing the work that Christ didn't finish."

In one phrase, it is crystal clear: Bill W. was an enemy of the Cross:

"(For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ:" (Philippians 3: 18)

Jesus Christ Himself declared "It is Finished" (John 19: 30)

Paul the apostle rebuked the Galatians for going back to the law:

"1O foolish Galatians, who hath bewitched you, that ye should not obey the truth, before whose eyes Jesus Christ hath been evidently set forth, crucified among you? 2This only would I learn of you, Received ye the Spirit by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith? 3Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit, are ye now made perfect by the flesh? 4Have ye suffered so many things in vain? if it be yet in vain. 5He therefore that ministereth to you the Spirit, and worketh miracles among you, doeth he it by the works of the law, or by the hearing of faith?" (Galatians 3: 1-5)

Every believer in the Body of Christ is called to grow in grace and knowledge of the Lord (2 Peter 3: 18). The law, rules, including the Twelve Steps, are "weak and beggarly elements". The law was a schoolmaster" which brings men and women to Christ, but then the law is no longer needed.

The Spirit of God lives in every man who believes on Jesus, and this Spirit guides man by peace. No sponsors, no "Twelve Steps", nothing else.

AA is a cult from the pit of hell, put together by a man who claimed to be a child of light, when he was indeed an "angel of light":

"And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light." (2 Chronicles 11: 14)

Instead of proclaiming the grace of God which is readily available to whosoever believes on Jesus Christ, Bill W. brought people back to rules and regulations, and thus to bondage, and in the process wanted to make himself a god:

"As many as desire to make a fair shew in the flesh, they constrain you to be circumcised; only lest they should suffer persecution for the cross of Christ. 13For neither they themselves who are circumcised keep the law; but desire to have you circumcised, that they may glory in your flesh." (Galatians 6: 12-13)

Bill W. was one of many "Judaizers" trying to bring back the law into the lives of men and women, and thus give himself something to brag about.

"Not God"? Not a chance!

Bipolar Diagnoses the Human Condition (Nothing More) -- A Final Inquiry

I reflect once again on Romans 7.

Paul's conflict in trying to keep the law is the same conflict which many religious people fight in their lives. The more devout and religious a person becomes, the greater the bondage that they will face in their lives.

AA makes this conflict worse. Psychiatry, based on the progressive impulse of human perfectibility, diagnoses a conflict which is inherent in human nature.

From Alexander Pope's "Essay on Man":

Know then thyself, presume not God to scan;
The proper study of mankind is man.


The modern temper has caused man to make himself God, with the inevitable internal conflicts of man wracking his attempts at stability and peace.

Chaos of thought and passion, all confused;
Still by himself abused, or disabused;
Created half to rise, and half to fall;
Great lord of all things, yet a prey to all;
Sole judge of truth, in endless error hurled;
The glory, jest, and riddle of the world!


Even Pope's appraisal suffers because of a poor recognition of  God as the first and the last of all things. For Pope to claim that man is "sole judge of truth" is either an unconscionable blasphemy, or a tongue-and-cheek remark blasting the arrogant folly of man as "Great lord of all things". Choosing the latter interpretation

"Chaos of though and passion, all confused" describes people who are diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and so in effect, every man will find himself sucked into the maelstrom of "self" if he is left to his own devices

"The glory, jest, and riddle of the world." The conjunction of these three descriptions should compel any man to accept that the world does not revolve around him, let alone start or end with him. In this one neat conceit, Pope puts to death the arrogant humanism of his time and the haughty and bereft modernism of today. Man cannot be the final explanation of anything, since he remains a riddle, with the answer forever lying outside of him. If he is a  "jest", Someone else must have told the joke. For anyone to claim glory, someone must be shining from outside of him to give this glory, or else there would be no glory to behold in the first place.

The conflicts within man also define man's state in a fallen world, and his need for a savior. "Bipolar disorder" describes every person, and for the most ends up on people who have refused to accept, or who have been taught to ignore, that they cannot find their truth and peace within themselves.

Christians (and Others) are not Bipolar Part II

Many people in AA or other Twelve Step programs are sand-bagged with this label -- bipolar--, yet the truth is that we are walking around with a renewed spirit, yet daily we must renew our minds to this truth, and we yield our bodies a living sacrifice to God.

Too many Christians are still operating under the Old Covenant, in which men and women had to keep the Ten Commandments in order to receive God's blessing. Yet even the Israelites themselves could not keep the law, so God provided that they would build an altar and sacrifice animals to atone for their sins.

Jesus Christ is the final sacrifice, the full justification of mankind. Neither AA nor psychiatry recognizes this wonderful Person nor all that He has done for us. Since there are no more animals to sacrifice, and since there is no further atonement for our sins, men and women on this earth either believe that Jesus did it all, or they go back to living by rules and regulations, rules which no one can keep, rules which conflict and contradict, rules which bring out the worst of us even when we are trying to do our best.

We want so much to do well, yet we fail, and when we fail, we deprecate ourselves for failing, and resolve to try still harder. The Bible gives a perfect display of this perverse inwardness:

"14For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. 15For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. 16If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. 17Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 18For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. 19For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. 20Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me." (Romans 7: 14-20)"

"I, I, I" The more that Paul tried to make Paul better, the worse it got. Our fallen bodies, this fallen nature, it's hopeless! Just reading this passage, one would think that Paul was "bipolar", when in reality Paul was a redeemed Spirit still trying to live a godly life in the flesh. It's the grace of God which makes us holy, not man's efforts (Titus 2: 11-12)

21I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. 22For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: 23But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? 25I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin. " (Romans 7: 21-25)

"I delight in the law after the inward man" yet the outward man does not want to cooperate. Hence, the "bipolar" dilemma.

AA makes this worse, not better, because even though the first step claims "powerless", it refuses to acknowledge that man is "dead in need of a new life." In fact, AA people may not drink, but they will obsess on other addictions, like smoking, coffee drinking, or other perversions just to get by, because the need for life, the need for a stable and thriving identity beyond oneself has not been fulfilled for them. Inevitably, the sense of loneliness and pain and hurt, all works of the flesh, resurge to the surface.

"I am an alcoholic" inevitable extends the "bipolar" personality, because men and women are identifying themselves with a perversion which they do not want to practice anymore.

Christians (and many Others) are Not Bipolar

Dr. Laura Schlesinger was one of the first people I ever heard who deliberately challenged people about "bipolar disorder" diagnoses.

Like many people, I was diagnosed with this illness as a child, when in reality I had quite a crazy upbringing.

This world is a mixed-up place, one where the rules changes from one station to the next, and even then wherever you end up, the people there tend to break the rules themselves, yet at the same time expect you to keep them.

It's maddening, especially for someone who wants to do what he is told, and get by. Life is not about getting by based on the "rules of the game", but rather it's about the Ruler, the King, playing the game through you. The second scenario is a lot better, but it's harder, especially for people who are still trying to earn God's approval, to get God's grace, to earn His righteousness.

What really drives people crazy? Trying to do the same things over and over, and getting the same results. Human beings who try to perfect or improve their feelings and their thoughts, such people will find themselves fighting a battle which they have already lost.

The law, the rules, God did not give them to us because human beings needed law and order. They were given to us so that we would all despair of our own efforts and seek a Savior. Man is dead in his trespasses, but without law, no one would know that he committed trespasses, and thus he would never believe that he is dead.

Many Christians have no problem with the trespasses part; most people, however, have not learned that every human being is dead because he is cut of spiritually from God the Father.

Jesus came to take away our sins, and give us His life. We are made alive in our spirit, but we still walk around in this "body of death", the flesh, which is the realm of self, effort, and self-effort.

The tragedy for many Christians is that they still identify with their bodies, not with the spirit of God who lives in them. For this reason, Christians will battle moods which are not in keeping with the Spirit within us. There are times in which Christians will behave in an "unchristian manner". When we identity with Christ, not with ourselves, not with our feelings, then we remember who we are, and we do not identity with out failings.

We will fail in thought, word, and deed; yet we are no longer called to focus on and fix ourselves. We are called to rest in Christ, grow in grace and knowledge of the Lord. He is our life, and He wants to live His life through us!

However, because we look at ourselves, feel bad about ourselves, regret our choices, our feelings, we get caught up in trying to make ourselves better. We drink over our disgust or pity, or we find ourselves losing control. Like many people, I got labeled "bipolar" for this frame of mind.

Yet nothing could be further from the truth.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

AA Meetings were a Default -- Part IV

I walked out of the Celebrate Recovery meetings in 2010, but I was still unaware of my new identity in Christ, of my new standing before the Father. The rest of the year, I still struggled with guilt and shame, fear and anger. I took on two long-term teaching assignments in Centinela Valley Union High School District, one of the most corrupt school districts in Los Angeles County (and there are many).

I was still trying to live this life on my own. I was beat down and beat up and beat all around. A frustrating period of time which brought me to the end of myself, so frustrated and distraught did I become that I just cried out to God for release from the chronic fear and anger in my life.

In a word, I was focused all over on myself, trying to improve the thoughts and feelings of my fallen man, when God wanted me to live out His love and grace through the Spirit of God within me.

I found myself having some rest and peace for the first time when I simply called out for help. The upset, the unrest, the frustration, all gone. I spent a number of months trying to explore what happened. What did I do? What had I done?

I had still not yet learned that I am in a body, possessing a soul, yet I am a spirit before God.

One more time, I resorted to a AA meeting to get some answers, to find some hope or direction.

I went back to the AA meetings at the church near Arnold Elementary.

I saw the same cast of people whom I had seen years before, empty, broken people still going through the steps, still focusing on themselves, telling their own stories as if anyone else really cared. I found that the Christians in the program had struggled to remain sober. The leader of the meeting that morning (it was January First, 2011) had just gotten drunk again, and was about to lose his job.
AA is worse for Christians, who have a concept of the Savior Jesus Christ, yet they are also convinced that they have to work for what he "freely gives". If you are confused just reading that, then you can understand why the Twelve Step program is bad for everyone, especially members of the Body of Christ.

That was the last AA  meeting that I attended. I met the same Pharisee Spirit in those meetings which I had confronted in the Celebrate Recovery programs. I saw that individual members were stuffed up with pride because they had worked their steps and stayed sober (although the program claims that God makes us sober, not our own efforts).

The AA meetings were a default for me, and they were primarily at fault for keeping me in bondage from the Truth who sets me free. Jesus Christ is our default, not our programs, not our feelings, not our thoughts, not what we do, but everything that Jesus Christ has done. He comes to live in us that He may quicken us into the life and that more abundantly that He wants us to receive.

AA Meetings Were a Default -- Part III

My third return to AA meeting, or more precisely "Celebrate Recovery", followed after another employment rout. I was teaching at a great charter school, but the inner turmoil within me was just so great.

The life and that more abundantly promised to every believer, I was not enjoying. I never knew that Jesus Christ came to live in me and lead me by His Spirit, that He has written His laws on my heart and mind, giving me internal guidance based on peace.

I was still looking at myself, at my feelings, trying to hold on to God, when He holds onto us, and no one, not one thing, can take us out of His hands.

It was a great school, but like all schools filled with dysfunction. I was really lost, no sense of peace and identity.

AA cannot give that to you, and the teaching that I had received in churches and in my own Bible studies never gave me the knowledge and training in righteousness and grace that every person in the Body of Christ deserves.

I walked off of that job, too, distraught and upset with all that I had to deal with, from the inside and the outside.

I was really lost, and I had no idea what I was doing. I did not understand why I was feeling the way I was feeling, so upset and fearful on the inside, unaware of who I was or what I had to do. Distracted by the turmoil on the inside, I was convinced that I needed to check in with other people, get their advice on what to do and how to proceed in this life.

I went to the local "Celebrate Recovery" meeting at one of the churches down the street from where I lived. I thought that "CR" would be better because instead of any old "higher power", I would be putting my trust in Christ Jesus.

This program is even worse than AA, because it has a form of godliness, yet denies its power. Paul came preaching the Gospel with power, that we have forgiveness of all our sins, and that in Christ we are justified from everything that the law of Moses could not justify us from.

Not once did I ever hear anyone glorify Jesus Christ or what He did at the Cross. The men and women whom I suffered with were going through the motions every week, talking about who was hurting their feelings, the struggles that they were having with their bosses, their spouses, their children. After singing for half an hour about how "I am a sinner saved by grace", then one of the leaders, who barely had more than three months of sobriety from whatever perversion, would lead the rest of the group through an empty teaching on one of the Twelves Steps, using scriptures to "support" the teaching, even the verses glorified man and not Christ and Him Crucified.

I suffered through those meetings for an entire year. The sense of guilt and shame that I felt was so great, and I had no way to get rid of it. I never understood the power of a guilty conscience until two years later, when Pastors like Creflo Dollar, Joseph Prince, Andrew Wommack, and Bob George explained to me the crucial importance of the Cross, Jesus' Finished Work, Christ living in me, and the deadness of our flesh which will still tempt us, yet the Spirit of God within us grants us righteousness and grace over and over (Romans 5: 17)

The sense of guilt which plagues a man goes deeper than what he has done. It infects his fallen flesh and his fallen mind, a sense of fear and guilt which Satan and and his minions loves to stir up. If a Christian has not learned that he is a new creation in Christ, that he is to reckon himself dead in his flesh, he will forever try to put out the fires of shame, fear, and guilt, when the shield of faith alone puts out those fiery darts, a faith which rests in the Finished Work of Jesus Christ.

A mixed message of "sins forgiven" if you confess and "unconditional love" if you work "The Twelve Steps" creates a meaningless contradiction which brings forth sin and death in mankind.

I was more unhappy in Celebrate Recovery meetings than in the secular meetings. The finger-pointing and provocation which I endured in those meetings was just too much. Men would cheat on their wives, cheat on their jobs, then go to the meetings and lecture me on how I was supposed to live my life.

I still remember one member who called me to tell me that he had called his mother "evil", yet he expected me just to listen instead of convicting him of the truth, which is that no matter how much  his mother had upset him, he had no right to lash out in anger. He was a broken man, one who was going to AA meetings, NA, SA (Sexaholics Anonymous) meetings, and even Debtors Anonymous. It was just crazy! I told him that he was going to too  many meetings. At least he admitted to me that his friends had cautioned him about the same things.

I was so afraid to step out in faith because I was in fear of all the bad things that I may do, of the terrible things that might befall me, or the mistakes that I would make. I felt in such bondage to my flesh, never realizing that Jesus came not just to die for my sins, but to give me His live and live our His life in me.

Celebrate Recovery diminishes Christ and Him Crucified, a shameful program that denies members of His power and deludes members into trusting themselves instead of resting in Himself.

I walked out of those meeting in May, 2010. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. The program does not work, no matter who works it, no matter how much anyone works that "program".

AA Meetings Were a Default -- Part II

Why did I go to that first meeting? I needed something stable, some tradition,  some pattern that I was comfortable with.

I will never forget what one member shared that evening:

"All I have is this moment right now."

That notion gave me a lot of peace. It reminded me of:

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

"Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." (Matthew 6: 33-34)

Yet even then, I was reading this verse without reference to the Finished Work. In Matthew 6, Jesus was declaring what would happen to every person who believed on Him. In Christ through the Holy Spirit, we receive this gift of righteousness every day.

In those days, I did not understand these things.

So, I went back to AA meetings to find whatever it was that I was missing.

After that one AA meeting in Lomita, I went to a "fellowship" in Torrance, at a meeting near Arnold Elementary.

This meeting was interesting. I found some support, since I was struggling to get through the last month of the school year, and barely at that. The previous day, I had thrown so many students out of class, that the referral room yelled at me and refused to receive any students from me.

I was really worked up, but one of the members in that meeting was a teacher who had been pushed through so many ups and downs in his life. He shared that he had been fired for "the cut of his hair", which usually happens to first and second year teachers who make an administrator "mad". I knew that feeling.

He told me to take it easy, not get so worked up about the end of the year, since very little was expected to get done, to begin with. "It's the end of the year. Relax!"

Another member came up to me during the break, a younger woman, though she was older than me. She told me that she related to much of what I had been telling her. She then told me that she had attempted suicide, then resigned from her job as an elementary school teacher. "I'm a good teacher," she told me, but she was struggling in her life with many issues.

That was not the first time that I ran into someone in an AA meeting who had attempted suicide, but more on that sordid trend later.

The first teacher whom I was talking to, a tall guy with blond hair, disdained the Gospel. He was convinced that this life is like a toilet bowl, and everyone is going down the drain. "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die" kind of thinking. He did not believe in Christ and Him Crucified, something which I refused to let go of, although I had no idea what else to hold onto.

As far as relaxing and taking it easy for the rest of the year, I did that, and all went well.

That was the last time that I went to a meeting for many months.

AA Meetings Were a Default

I remember one preacher telling his parishioners:

"Let Jesus be your default."

He is our starting point and the finish line:

"Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God." (Hebrews 12: 2)

and

"Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever." (Hebrews 13: 8)

He is the first and the last, the Alpha and the Omega, the Lamb who was set aside to be slain for all the sins of the world before the foundation of the world.

Yet if a Christian refuses to rest in the Truth, that He Finished the Work that God the Father set out for Jesus to do, then he will default into something else, every time some work, habit, or tradition of man.

For me, who had been for so longed reared in the falsehood that I needed the "Twelve Steps", I would go back to an AA meeting when I had no idea what else to do. The mindset was a stubborn one, an attitude which impressed on me that if I just sat in a meeting and listened to other people share their stories of "what it was like", "what happened", and "what it's like now".

2008 was a tough time for me. I had had two successful interviews for teaching positions, first in South Whittier, then in Brea. The second interview was such a hit, that the principal called me three times after the interview to let me know that he wanted to give me the job.

After the first week on the job, my worst fears came true: this was a white school where the rich kids got away with everything, where the students could walk all over the teachers, and the parents would complain to the administrators if the teacher took a heavy hand to disrespect.

Within one month, after frequent sleepless nights and arrogant, bitter students yelling at me and tattling on me to the principal, I walked off the job.

I was demoralized and lost. My own mother spent more time shaming me for not being able to keep a job. All she had was the same AA poison, which at the time did not seem like anything remotely related to what was giving me the difficulties I was facing.

At one point, we had broken off, and I was back to subbing one day at a time, just trying to get through, just hoping that perhaps the next school that I worked for would give me support and the parents would give me respect.

I was getting more nervous and uptight, I had no sense of peace and safety in my life, since I could not predict how I would feel when I walked onto the next jobsite. I did not understand why I felt the way that I did at the time, but looking back I learned that I was filled with fear, an orphan spirit, instilled in me by a sin conscience, which afflicted me with an empty, fearful foreboding:

"26For if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins, 27But a certain fearful looking for of judgment and fiery indignation, which shall devour the adversaries." (Hebrews 10: 26-27)

Paul writes this to his Hebrew brethren, many of whom believed that Jesus was the Messiah, yet they had not yet rested on the Truth that He is the final sacrifice for all our sins for all time, so they were still offering animal sacrifices at the Temple, which Paul called "sinning wilfully".

In effect, any believer who sits in AA meetings and keeps working the Twelve Steps in order to reestablish fellowship is "sinning wilfully"', in that they are acting as if Jesus' once and for all death at the Cross was not enough.

This fearful foreboding had not left me because I was "working a program" which told me that I was not completely forgive, nor that Jesus had given me a new heart with His life leading me by His Holy Spirit.

So, I returned to AA meetings.

I went to one meeting in Lomita, where I heard the same set of advice that I had suffered through for two years while earning my teaching credential. "Keeping coming back, it works if you work it." "Easy does it." "You are right where you should be", and a new one that I learned at that meeting: "You are should-ing all over yourself."

This same guy who told me about "should-ing" had shared some outrage over another guy in a different meeting who acted as if he had "just gotten off the phone with God." He was distressed and resentful that another member had the "boldness" to enter the throne of grace and ask God for anything that he needed.

Yet in AA, the sense that members walk away with is a "god" who is not powerful, or one who is indifferent to the sufferings of men. Such is the consequence of letting men choose "their own conception of God."

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Christians in AA are in Denial, about who they are in Christ

"Denial is not a river in Egypt" -- Ha! Ha!

Granted, most people in AA meeting have heard this joke. There is even a book with this title, lots of jokes about codependency, alcoholism, recovery, and those Twelve Steps with this title.

Many Christians, whether in Twelve Step meetings, Celebrate Recovery, or any other therapy programs, are in denial, too.

They are completely unsure or unaware or unwilling to step out in who they are. We are all made the righteousness of God in Christ. We are all brought into Sonship through Christ Jesus by the Holy Spirit, which Jesus Christ released upon the world when He sat down at the right hand of the Father.

Most Christians are so ignorant of who they are in Christ, and the Twelve Step programs only make it worse. If we are accepted in the Beloved (Ephesians 1: 6), then we should start accepting that this cannot be changed.

Jesus promised us eternal life (John 3: 16), His life and that more abundantly (John 10: 10).How can we live the abundant life when we refuse to reckon ourselves dead to this body of sin which distracts us from His Spirit?

Some people are so concerned with sin, that they cannot believe "As He is, so are we in this world." (1 John 4: 17)

One Bible translator and missionary was so caught up in "Celebrate Recovery", that he could not "Celebrate Righteousness" or "Celebrate Resurrection". All of this focusing on sin and inventories and "restoring fellowship" with God is an insult to all that Jesus has done, and frustrates the New Covenant:

"For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, saith the Lord; I will put my laws into their mind, and write them in their hearts: and I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people:

"And they shall not teach every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the Lord: for all shall know me, from the least to the greatest.

"For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more." (Hebrews 8: 10-12)

He does not remember our unrighteousness, sins, and iniquities. Instead of trying to fix our feelings and our thoughts, we are to fix our eyes on Christ seated at the right hand of the Father (Colossians 3: 3-4), and from Him we keep receiving righteousness and grace (Romans 5: 17), the two gifts which cause us reign in life.

We are kings and priests before God, yet too many Christians are living in "Denial", refusing to accept that they have been baptized by the Spirit of God into the Body of Christ.

"I Want a New Family"

The best prayer that anyone can pray if they find themselves in a "dysfunctional family" is

"I want a new family".

Outside of the Holy Trinity of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, every family of men is forever "dysfunctional", can never be perfect.

Even the best parents in the world can never measure up to God the Father:

"For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. 16The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: 17And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together." (Romans 8: 15-17)

and

"6And because ye are sons, God hath sent forth the Spirit of his Son into your hearts, crying, Abba, Father. 7Wherefore thou art no more a servant, but a son; and if a son, then an heir of God through Christ." (Galatians 4: 6-7)

One of the most cherished trends in therapy and self-help groups, the parents bear the brunt for all the evil and wrongdoing in our lives. While we can assess the poor words, choices, and deeds of our parents as a cause of the wrong thinking, the poor habits, and the crippling comfort measures, there is no excuse for us to blame those who hurt us when God our Abba (Daddy!) sent His Son to die for us, then rise from the dead as a sign of our full justification then adoption as children of God (1 John 3: 1)

Stop blaming your parents for the bad things that they did. Start rejoicing that you have a new Father, and because of what His Son has done, you can receive His Spirit of adoption and come to Daddy whenever you want.

AA: Focusing on Self, not on Life

The more that I learn about what I suffered in AA, abiding by these empty principles which have nothing to do with life and that more abundantly, the more that I now realize how contrary the program has become to real living.

One guy in the Hermosa Beach club claimed that the "Big Book" tells him how to start his day. The Big Book would tell him what to do, where to go, and all the rest.

I was reduced to such dependence in my life. AA teaches people that they have nothing going for them on the inside, that this life is just a collection of moments in which you work this program, getting to know some Higher Power.

Of course, to talk about God as "Father" and God as "Principal" creates more problems than it removes. How can anyone talk about God as Father if at the same time we have to look at ourselves and make sure that we never sin, never fail, never fall short?

One mantra in the program goes "progress not perfection", but there is no progress when it comes to our thoughts and feelings, when it comes to our mistakes with other people. The solution is not to take one's inventory and hope that we do better next time. The Tenth Step talks about setting up a ledger in which we look at our day and figure out what we did right and what we did wrong.

Life is not book-keeping. Life is not a series of problems waiting to be fixed. Life is a person, His name is Jesus Christ.

God is so good, in that  He sent His Son to the Mercy Seat for all our sins, and that in Him we can have righteousness, peace, and joy. He gives us Himself, He grants us His life, and in Him we reign.

AA makes people focus on self, creates a life in which members are trying to live right and not do wrong. This is not life. When Adam and Eve ate from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they died. God wants us to receive His life and let Him live through us. We do not have to live a life of getting because in Christ we receive all things.

For a longer time than I had realized, I have lived a "right-wrong" life, waiting for something or someone to tell me what to do and whether I was doing it right or not. This revelation is both new and timely, old and timeless. Human beings are not brought into this world in order to follow a plan of action. God made us so that we would have life, and that more abundantly.

I now realize why I had the problems that I had in my life. If your whole existence founders on getting through the day without failing or making a mistake, then there is really no point to waking up in the first place. If we go out in the world to find something engaging and interesting, in the end whatever we receive is not satisfying enough.

I had no identity apart from what I did or did not do. I was a "good student" or a "good worker",  but not much else. Life is a Person, and this Person wants to live and move and have His being within us. Nothing could be more fantastic!

No wonder I was so bereft of life. Nothing was worthwhile, and a life that revolves around fulfilling and feeling good about "The Twelve Steps" is not life. The more that I rest in the truth that all of my sins are forgiven, that I do not have to spend my life looking over my shoulder, the more free I am to let the Peace of Christ rule and let the Spirit of God direct me in the way that He would have me go.

Thank God for the New Covenant:

"For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, saith the Lord; I will put my laws into their mind, and write them in their hearts: and I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people:

"And they shall not teach every man his neighbour, and every man his brother, saying, Know the Lord: for all shall know me, from the least to the greatest.

"For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more." (Hebrews 8: 10-12)

The whole New Covenant flies or falls on the last verse, that in Christ we find the propitiation for all our sins, and God will never, ever remember them again. Until we rest in the full acceptance of this truth, the Adversary, the Accuser Satan can use the law, our past, and the reproach of men in this fallen world to bring us into bondage.

One of the most pernicious lies in AA is that our feelings and thoughts can block us from "the sunlight of the Spirit". So for years, I would live trying to protect my feelings, make sure that no one made me mad. Memories which could trigger upset I would try to purge from my thinking, when in truth it is God who causes us to forget because we can rest in Christ our new self, and let His Finished Work remove from us the stain of sin and past hurts.

Now I can safely say, assess in truth, I was convinced that fears and upsets would stop the flow of God's Spirit in my lives, when nothing could be further from the truth. Christ lives in every believer, and His Spirit quickens us to will and to do for His good pleasure (Philippians 2: 12)

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

AA, Guilt, and Jesus Christ (Final)

I was raised believing that the Bible, the word of God, gave us knowledge about Jesus Christ, but the "Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous" helped make living "practical". I would read my "one chapter a day" in the Bible, then I would read sections from the other "Big Book" along with selections from "One Day at a Time in Al-Anon" or "As Bill Sees It", a collection of maxims and "insights" from AA founder Bill W. or other prominent leaders in Alcoholics Anonymous.

From a young age, I often found that I was easily upset, even irritable. It was easy to hurt my feelings, and other people had this inexplicable ability to "make me mad." Taking my hints from the Twelve Steps, I would "take my inventory", trying to figure out what I had done wrong.
As I grew up, I found that making individual decisions for myself became more difficult. Often, I was afraid of making someone mad or doing something wrong. Even though at the time I did not realize it, I was falling into the same patterns which define "adult children of alcoholics." But no one in my house was a practicing alcoholic.

For many years, I struggled with guilt, anger, fear, all the terrible emotions which cause people to drink, at least according to the AA program. Every time that I got "a resentment", I would panic because now I had to "do something" about this feeling, or else "something bad" would happen. Often, I would get nervous talking to people, wondering if I had done or said something wrong, or worrying that they would say or do something which would "make me mad".

Since I have learned more about Jesus Christ and Him Crucified, I have learned that through Him all my sins are forgiven. II do not confess my sins in order to get right with God, but through Christ I have passed from dead in my tresspasses to alive in Christ. Now I am a child of God, whom I can call "Daddy!" because of my standing in righteousness. I have not only learned that "AA" is not necessary for practical living, but it inhibits "Life and that more abundantly" (John 10: 10) through Christ.

The greatest need for man is acceptance, or more specifically "righteousness". Yet something in every man wars against this sense of peace, the sense that something that we have done or may do will get us in "big trouble" or rather that we must "do something." This inner turmoil is a manifestation of the spiritual death which every person born into this world will manifest. God made man in His image, yet when Adam sinned against God, he died by being separated from God. Since then, man is born in the image of fallen Adam, yet the last Adam, Jesus Christ, God in the flesh, came to reconcile all of mankind to God, so that we may receive His righteousness, perfect acceptance, His standing as a Son, and His eternal life.

The sense of "wrong-doing" which afflicts many Christians, and even adherents to other faiths, has a name: sin conscience.

By defining people by their addiction, AA makes this sense of wrongdoing worse. Their drinking is a symptom of people who want to undo the inner death in every person, a desire to make oneself OK. People do not treat us nicely, or we fail to measure up to our own self-righteous standards, and so we drink.

It is shameful and abusive for any one group or program to label people based on bad or self-destructive behaviors. Such pernicious labeling messes with a person's identity. This identity issue, more than health or wealth, makes all the difference for us. Identity helps us to make decisions, assess our skills, define our place in this world. We need to know who we are, and through this reality we receive we find acceptance.

Contrary to vile religious teachings or traditional understandings, God is not mad at the world anymore. God took out all His wrath on His Son -- all of it -- and offers to every person the gifts of righteousness and grace through faith to become "the righteousness of God in Christ (2 Corinthians 5: 21). Christ Jesus then comes into the life of a believer through His Holy Spirit, who grants to us a never-ending conviction of righteousness (John 16: 10), or knowledge beyond thinking or feeling that we are "OK".

AA teaches people that they have to "take their inventory" in order to stay in "spiritually fit condition". AA teaches people to keep looking at themselves, to make sure to catch themselves before they slip into guilt, fear, resentment, or selfish thinking. The whole program just stirs up a "sin" or "guilty" conscience in people. Every time that I would get afraid, I would get angry that I got afraid, then I would focus on myself, trying not to feel that way. It made mountains out of emotional mole-hills, to say the least. Only recently have I learned that our feelings merely respond to what we are thinking. If someone goes about thinking that they have to watch their feelings and "keep short accounts", then it will not be long before this person feels forever trapped in a cycle of "getting by" to avoid "getting upset".

Worst of all, the hurt feelings from the wrongs that people have done in the past, or the wrongs which others have done to us, do not go away with a "Fourth Step" followed by confessing these "wrongs" to an untrustworthy "sponsor". That "sense" of guilt or wrongdoing just creeps up on people. The Twelve Steps cannot remove man's fallen nature, even though he receives the Spirit of God. This other element about the Christian was never taught to me. I now have Christ living in me, but I still walk around in "the flesh", in a body and a mind which can easily resent, fear, or give into other perversions. Yet as long as I rest in my new identity in Christ, I never need fear falling into sin.

The only way to give our conscience the rest that we seek, the acceptance that we crave, is through the Cross, where we can know and believe that all our sins are forgiven, and that through Jesus' death, we receive His perfect righteousness and Himself living and guiding us through His Spirit. To confess our sins, to make amends with others, or any other activity for a sense of "getting right with God" only makes us more sad and depressed, focusing on ourselves, and thus induces people to engage in addictions or perversions to distract ourselves or calm our emptiness.

AA fosters a guilty conscience; through Christ, you can be made perfect within that His life may live through you.

AA, Guilty Conscience, and Jesus Christ

I was brought up in an "Alcoholics Anonymous" home.

My father drinks wine and beer from time to time, nothing excessive; my mother was a "recovering alcoholic". Never once did she drink in my presence. Before I was born, she had been going to AA meetings. She had quit drinking and remained sober for almost thirty-four years.

My sister and I were reared knowing and hearing and even reading "Alcoholics Anonymous", otherwise known as "The Big Book" for people in the AA program.

I was raised believing that the Bible, the word of God, gave us knowledge about Jesus Christ, but the "Big Book" helped make living "practical". I would read my "one chapter a day" in the Bible, then I would read sections from the other "Big Book" along with selections from "One Day at a Time in Al-Anon" or "As Bill Sees It", a collection of maxims and "insights" from AA founder Bill W. or other prominent leaders in Alcoholics Anonymous.

From a young age, I often found that I was easily upset, even irritable. It was easy to hurt my feelings, and other people had this inexplicable ability to "make me mad." Taking my hints from the Twelve Steps, I would "take me inventory", trying to figure out what I had done wrong.

As I grew up, I found that making individual decisions for myself became more difficult. Often, I was afraid of making someone mad or doing something wrong. Even though at the time I did not realize it, I was falling into the same patterns which define "adult children of alcoholics." But no one in my house was a practicing alcoholic.

My mother was practically a 'cult-adherent' of this program. She claimed that either everyone was an alcoholic, or they were "in denial." She even called me "an alcoholic who did not drink." For many years, I accepted this nonsense. Since it was my mother who had been telling me this garbage, I took her word for it. From a young age into early adulthood, I was living "the program".

For many years, I struggled with guilt, anger, fear, all the terrible emotions which cause people to drink, at least according to the AA program. Every time that I got "a resentment", I would panic because now I had to "so something" about this feeling, or else "something bad" would happen. Often, I would get nervous talking to people, wondering if I had done or said something wrong, or worrying that they would say or do something which would "make me mad".

Since I have learned more about Jesus Christ and Him Crucified, that through Him all my sins are forgiven, that I do not confess my sins in order to get right with God, that through Christ I have passed from dead in my trespasses to alive in Christ, a child of God, whom I can call "Daddy!" because of my standing in righteousness, I have not only learned that "AA" is not necessary for practical living, but in fact is detrimental to having "Life and that more abundantly" through Christ.

The greatest need for man is acceptance, not just money, power, prestige. Yet something in every man wars against this sense of peace, the sense that something that we have done or may do will get us in "big trouble" or rather that we must "do something."

This inner turmoil is a manifestation of the spiritual death which every person born into this world will manifest. God made man in His image, yet when Adam sinned against God, he died by being separated from God. Since then, man is born in the image of fallen Adam, yet the second Adam, Jesus Christ, God in the flesh, came to reconcile all of mankind to God, so that we may receive His righteousness, perfect acceptance, His standing as a Son, and His eternal life.

The sense of "wrong-doing" which afflicts many Christians, and even adherents to other faiths, has a name

Men and women who struggle with alcohol should not be defined by their addiction. Their drinking is a symptom of man who wants to undo the inner death and emptiness in his life, his desire to make himself OK. People do not treat us nicely, or we fail to measure up to our own self-righteous standards, and so people drink.

It is shameful and abusive for any one group or program to label people based on poor or self-destructive behavior. It was even more abusive for my own mother to label me "alcoholic" when I never even drank! Yet such pernicious labeling can mess with a person's identity. This identity issue, more than health or wealth, makes all the difference of us. This matter of identity helps us to make decisions, assess our skills, define our place in this world, filled with conflicting and cluttered opinions. We need to know who we are, and this reality we receive when we know that we are accepted.

Contrary to vile religious teachings or traditional understandings, God is not mad at the world anymore. God took out all His wrath on His Son -- all of it -- and offers to every person to receive His grace through faith to become "the righteousness of God in Christ (2 Corinthians 5: 21). Christ Jesus then comes into the life of a believer through His Holy Spirit, who grants to us a never-ending conviction of righteousness (John 16: 10), or the knowledge beyond our own thinking or feeling that we are "OK".

AA teaches people that they have to "take their inventory" in order to stay in "spiritually fit condition". AA teaches people to keep looking at themselves, to make sure to catch themselves before they slip into fear, resentment, or selfish thinking. The whole program just stirs up a "sin" or "guilty" conscience in people. Every time that I would get afraid, I would get angry that I got afraid, I would focus on myself, trying not to feel that way. It made mountains out of emotional mole-hills, to say the least. Only recently have I learned that our feelings merely respond to what we are thinking. If someone goes about thinking that they have to watch their feelings and "keep short accounts", then it will not be long before this person feels forever trapped in a cycle of "getting by" to avoid "getting upset".

Worst of all, the hurt feelings from the wrongs that people have done in the past, or the wrongs which others have done to us, do not go away with a "Fourth Step" followed by confessing these "wrongs" to an untrustworthy "sponsor", then go about and make amends for it. That "sense" of guilt or wrongdoing just creeps up on people. The Twelve Steps cannot remove man's fallen nature, even though he receives the Spirit of God. This other element about the Christian was never taught to me. I now have Christ living in me, but I still walk around in "the flesh", in a body and a mind which can easily resent, fear, or give into other perversions. Yet as long as I rest in my new identity in Christ, I never need fear falling into sin.

The only way to give our conscience the rest that we seek, the acceptance that we crave, is through the Cross, where we can know and believe that all our sins are forgiven, and that through Jesus' death, we receive His perfect righteousness and Himself living and guiding us through His Spirit. To confess our sins, to make amends with others, or any other activity to give us a sense of "getting right with God" only makes us more sad and depressed, focusing on ourselves, and thus inducing people to engage in addictions or perversions to distract ourselves or calm our emptiness.

AA fosters a guilty conscience; through Christ, you can be made perfect within that His life may live through you.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Start in the Light

The member of AA is told that he must maintain his standing in the sunlight of the Spirit.

The Bible teaches that for the believer in Christ and Him Crucified, he is already in the light:

"But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin." (1 John 1:7)

In fact, every believer who rests in the promise of Christ and Him Crucified is defined by His light:

"Ye are all the children of light, and the children of the day: we are not of the night, nor of darkness." (1 Thessalonians 5: 5)

How can we not walk in the Sunlight of the Spirit?

In effect, every day we must wake up not in order to get right with God, but remember by receiving His gifts of righteousness and grace that we are now in the light, for God is Light:

"This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all." (1 John 1: 5)

and

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning." (James 1: 17)

Instead of looking at ourselves, our thoughts, our deeds, our words, let us take in the Word of God:

"But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God." (Matthew 4: 4)

Start in the Light when you wake up every day, because that is where you are.

Woititz and Adult Children of Alcoholics

I remember reading "Adult Childern of Alcoholics" by Janet Woititz as a kid.

I was a kid, mind you, yet my mother, who called herself an "adult child of an alcoholic," had me read those books so that I could learn more about who I am and what problems I would have later on in life.

Just writing that first line forced me to recognize how sick it was for anyone to be training me to believe such drivel.

Much of the recovery literature drives people to define themselves by the failures of their parents instead of granting them insight into the freedoms which everyone of us has by the grace of God.

People who have grown up in abusive homes do not need to be abused again into believing that their past will determine their future.

When someone is in pain, most often we are focusing on ourselves, looking at our thoughts and feelings as the final resting place for who we are. This pernicious set of thinking is just wicked. This premise has kept victims of abuse in bondage for years, and has led to the death of many others who cannot see themselves out of the limiting beliefs imposed by these terrible programs.

What we need in this life is not a "good" self-image, but a "proper", one based on an eternal standard, not how we feel, not what we think.

When I learned that in Christ I was made "the righteousness of God" (2 Corinthians 5: 21), I found a standard for myself that was greater than my successes, better than my failures, and more than the opinions, thoughts, certainties, the past, the future, the present, or anything else in this life. This source of identity is the most important for us.

To define someone by their problems with drinking, or the failures of one's parents will only set them up to do the very things which awaken resentment inside of them in the first place.

Now more than ever, I am outraged at the wickedness folly of therapists and psychologists and social workers who turn people to look at themselves more, only to find more of the same pain and suffering following them around.

We do not need to learn more about ourselves, for man has eternity in his hearts (Ecclesiastes 3: 11). We need more than better thinking, or a resolution with our past. Everyone of us needs life and that more abundantly. We need a stable and strong sense of ourselves not based in ourselves.

The more I research these issues, the more that I see the primacy of man's mind and his thinking over the deeper need of his soul, of his spirit, of the certainty of things beyond one's thinking.

Such teachings have no concourse with the Bible or with Jesus Christ and Him Crucified., who grants to everyone who believes the grace to be named a child of God.