Not Afraid As Much As Ashamed

I felt bad about being afraid.

The issue was not the fear.

The real issue was the shame about my feelings.

I really believed that I had to undo my fears and resentments in order to come to God.

This issue is not a new one, which I have commented on in this blog.

The issue begins and ends with thinking that we have to bring something to God, when God alone brings all things to us.

If I felt bad, I felt bad about it.

I have commented at length how carnal I was, and I submit that many Christians can be, too.

Thank God for the ministries of many people on television and around the world.

We are not our feelings, and more importantly, no matter what we feel, no matter how bad we feel, He is at work in our lives, in fact, He is our life, because of all that Jesus did at the Cross.

Yet for so long, I attached so many hardships to my feelings, if I felt bad, I would struggle with all my might not to feel bad.

The grace of God was never clear in my life.

I still kept thinking, like many people, that I had to add something, to do something, or to complete the work.

Not even.

So, the feelings of fear and anger would erupt inside -- yet that is not who any of us are.

We are not our feelings, and never should we tie the goodness of God with the badness, or the frustrations, in our flesh.

This "indwelling sin" which all of us have might explain the difficulties, if not the intense mental struggles (and illnesses) which individuals face on an ongoing basis.

Not an issue of fear, but shame about the feelings, that was what was giving me such a hard time.

The notion that how one feels determines whether God is with us or against us.

That was the bondage I lived in, and I pray that anyone who reads this blog can learn that no matter what you feel. His righteousness is a gift which He keeps on giving, and you need never fear that how you feel or what you think will make something less of God living and  blessing you.