True Humility Has Nothing To Do With You

The AA Big Book spends a great deal of time talking about humility.

At the same time, though, the program never defines this key assent.

Frankly, the program cannot, since humility means not focusing on ourselves but rather seeing Christ and Him Crucified in all things.

Contrary to the common phrases floating around in AA, those cliches which sap the life out of any reasonable discussion on matters, humility is a lot more than what we think or do not think of ourselves.

Humility is not thinking less of yourself. People who esteem themselves poorly actually esteem themselves too much. Someone says: "I hate myself! I'm so ugly!" are not making any sense. If they truly hated themselves, they would be delighted that they were ugly.

Yet ultimately, their attitude about their appearance demonstrates that they wish that they were pretty, or that they are thinking of themselves as they should be as compared to how they are.


Furthermore, humility is not thinking less of yourself, either.

The focus on self in itself is part of the problem. AA does not solve this problem of self, but actually makes it worse because the program teaches members to take their inventory, talk about their faults and their feelings with other people, then go out and do something to work the program.

How anyone can claim progress and not perfection sums up the great failure of this program.

A desire to improve one's life, maintain one's emotional balance, all of that ends up creating more problems for individuals.

There is no way that we human beings can improve our flesh: our senses, our thoughts, our feelings.

We live in a dead, fallen world, where things just do not measure up.

The notion that we can try harder and thus do more will never suffice.

Paul relates the unending frustration of trying to improve his behavior by living under law:

"21I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me. 22For I delight in the law of God after the inward man: 23But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? 25I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin." (Romans 7: 21-25)

There is sin and death in ourselves, and we need life, not a new program to live.

I recall one instance when I was speaking with a young man, and he related that the harder he tried to be good, the worse it got. All of his efforts amounted to more frustration. The same block hits up professionals in all endeavors. They slump in their efforts, or they hit a snag in trying to accomplish something, and instead of letting go and letting their skills flow, they try harder and harder, only to find that their capacity to perform actually diminishes.

Our flesh, our self-effort, produces more of self and less effort, fewer, poorer results.

That's all there is too it.

There is a better way, indeed,  but not through the Twelve Steps. The Way, the Truth, and the Life provides us all things.

This life is provided for us by the death and resurrection of Christ Jesus:

"And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses; 14Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross; 15And having spoiled principalities and powers, he made a shew of them openly, triumphing over them in it." (Colossians 2: 13-15)

and

"1If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. 3For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. 4When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory." (Colossians 3: 1-4)

Jesus Christ is our life, and He is life.

We do not create humility by focusing on  ourselves, or even our not focusing on ourselves.

Such a repetitive, empty effort creates more self, more frustration.

Instead of focusing on ourselves, we are called to focus on Christ and receive all things from Him:

"But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." (2 Corinthians 3: 18)

and

"What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? 32He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things? " (Romans 8: 31-32)

True humility has nothing to do with us, whether we think of ourselves, try to not think of ourselves, or do anything else which involves our efforts.

Humility is all about God, and seeing Him more and more:

"Whereupon the princes of Israel and the king humbled themselves; and they said, The LORD is righteous." (2 Chronicles 12: 6)

and also

"But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble." (James 4: 6)

Grace is unmerited favor, and we receive this grace through the Beloved, in Jesus Christ:

"To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved." (Ephesians 1: 6)

Humility has nothing to do with us, and rather everything to do with all that Christ Jesus has done for us and is committed to keep doing for us.