In November 2017, I was stuck. I had no car, and I needed some form of transportation.
At that point, someone had offered me her car.
She wanted $1,500 for it, and I was ready to purchase it.
Of course, before purchasing a vehicle, it is essential to get the car checked out by a mechanic, who can tell you what is wrong with it, whether it's worth purchasing.
When you a buy a used car, you by it "as is." If something happens to it three days or three months later, it doesn't matter.
It's your car, and you have to take care it.
When my friend found out that I had gotten the car checked out at a local mechanic, she got really upset with me. "I can't believe you did that!" She said. She then was shocked that I had paid a certain amount to get the car checked out, which was a little more than I would have paid if I had gone to the mechanic closer to me.
However, the car I wanted to purchase was in the Inland Empire, and I live in the South Bay. I had to go with the closest mechanic to get it checked out.
While the car was getting checked out, another friend, Robert, asked me how I was going to maintain the car since I didn't have a stable stream of income at the time.
That was a good question, one which I didn't have an answer for, and one which I didn't want to try and answer at the time.
Ultimately, I decided not to buy the car because there was so much that would have to be fixed. I would have to spend as much fixing the car as I would have spent having purchased the car.
I decided against it, and I was really upset about it. I wanted to have a vehicle so that I could get around, I could go to all the activism events and raise heaven. But it was not to be.
All told, I was without a car from October 2017 to July 2018: nine months.
In spite of that, I rented a car when I absolutely needed something to get from Point A to Point B. There were times when fellow activist friends would give me a ride. Other times, I would just walk to a key event.
Then there were those moments when I had to decline going to an event. That's just the way it had to be.
Because I no longer had a reliable, easily available vehicle, I simply had to say "No" to fellow activists. Because of this inability to drive anywhere, I had to stop going to the city of Huntington Park. I had spent nearly three years protesting that city council for their appointment of two illegal aliens. A sentiment had resided within me that it was time to let this go and pursue other goals.
But my flesh, this sense of self-effort, simply would not allow me to walk away from this issue. Finally, because I was incapable of actually going to the city council, it was over. Wiht that, I had to tell other leaders in the pro-enforcement movement that I was not going to Huntington Park: "If you are not going, then we are going to drop this project," one person had told me.
Then that's the way it had to be. I was forced to let go of something which needed to be released a long time ago.
And this was spiritual growth for me. I was not used to letting stuff go. I was not used to trusting that God was at work behind the scenes regarding all of these issues. I look back on those times, and I have to admit that I reallly didn't believe that God was taking care of me, taking care of the situation.
I had such little faith in Him.
As I had written before, I did not have a car. I was borrowing, renting, or just walking from point A to Point B. That was the best that I could do.
Then I started trying to look for work, since I could not rely on the donations which came with freelance journalism and activism.
It was a dark time, a frustrating time for me.
1. I had no car.
2. I had no stable income.
3. I had a criminal matter hanging over my head.
4. I had no idea what my future was going to look like. I had no desire to go from point A to Point B. Like young King Solomon, I did not know how to come in or go out.
And then, and then I realized the essential importance of meditating on His righteousness. I had to stop looking at my circumstances as the final determinant for anything, for everything.
It was all about looking at Christ Jesus. Seeing more of Jesus makes the difference.
I have related before how my fortunes flipped in one day. I had a car and I had a new job within one weekend!
The grace, the peace, the knowledge that God was indeed looking out for me in every way, that shined through every element of my life. It was just wonderful.
I look back on the situation that I was going through without a vehicle. I had endured frustration and shame from one friend because I had not purchased the car initially offered to me.
God was really looking out for me at that time. If I had purchased that car, I would have been in a terrible spot, because the costs of maintainence, plus gas and other amenities would have bankrupted me.
God's timing was perfect. God's time is perfect.
I realize that God was not only working from behind the scenes, but He was ensuring that everything did occur at the right place at the right time, so that I would not be ruined, hurt, burdened.
God's blessings bless us indeed, and they add no hurt!
Hallelujah!
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