All that Wrangling on the Inside is Gone

 I am no longer focused on this insane internal dialogue inside of me.

That sense of "how do I get through the day?" or "What do I do today?" is all gone.

No longer am I trying to figure things out. No longer do I wake up with this strange feeling, this sense of dread and overwhelm that the world is just a big scary place and I am all alone in it.

There is no longer this sense of drudgery and demand in my life.

I realize now that I am not trying to live this life on my own. I realize that this life is not something that I am trying to create through my own efforts.

All this time, I thought it was so normal to have all these thoughts, fears, wonders, and machinations inside of me. 

Now, I realize that all of that wrangling and wondering is a manifestation of flesh.

Indeed, I was trying too hard. There is no need to put so much effort into this life. Things are working out just fine, and I do not have to try so hard, try to figure everything out on my own to make things happen.

I am not alone. God is on the job. He has been working behind the scenes for quite some time.

His life has been flowing in me since the moment that I believed on Him. The problem that followed was that I thoguht that I had to add a bunch of other things in order to ensure that His life would keep flowing in me.

That is all wrong.

But all of this explains the struggle that I faced when I would have bad thoughts, unpleasant feelings, fears and worries about the future, etc.

I am not alone in this world! Jesus is taking care of me every step of the way! All this time, I was so busy looking at myself, and not looking at HIMSELF. 

Wow! What a mistake. Thank you, Jesus, for enlightening the eyes of my heart!