I Could Not Rest Because of Mixed Messaging

"Be still and know that I am God." (Psalm 46:10)

You cannot rest, however, if you do not think that God is on the job, or that you have to do something so that God will do something in turn.

One of the most notorious contradictions in the Alcoholics Anonymous cult, and throughout establishment Christendom, is this strange notion that God is taking care of everything ... BUT.

That "BUT" is so poisonous. This sense of "you need to do something more" was a rampant pressure that I would feel inside of me all the time.

Every day that I woke up, there was this question that would emerge inside of me: "What are you going to do today?"

This sense that I was all alone in the world, and that everything began and ended with me, was so prevalent in my life. UGH.

What a drama. What a stressor. What a weight I carried on my shoulders!

The stupid AA cult tells people "Let Go! Let God!"

And yet, you have to work these stupid Twelve Steps non-stop to stay one step ahead of alcohol overtaking your life again.

What is this madness? This is the worst of mixed-messaging ever. That is beyond outrageous.