Infighting seems like an ongoing constant in many of these groups. Little conflicts emerge, hurt feelings happen, and there are so many misunderstandings.
Yet for all of the things that happen, all the disagreements, I have remained at peace.
For one, I tell individuals that they need to take up their issues with those whom they are in conflict.
I draw this wisdom from Jesus:
"15Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican. 18Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven." (Matthew 18: 15-18)
Notice how Jesus instructs us to talk to the person who has hurt us alone.
Most people won't do that. They air their grievances publicly and shame people on social media so that everyone is in on the fight.
Many times I tell friends of mine to take their conflicts up with others. It's not good for them to run to me when they have an issue with someone else, and they haven't even bothered to say anything to first person in the first place!
What helps people to unite and stay united?
Not a focus on issues or even a project, since the process can get in the way of the goals.
Unity works out best in an individual, in the proper leader who can inspire and unite disparate cohorts and factions within a movement.
For me, my leader,my identity is found in Christ Jesus!
In Him, we leave off the disunity, the bickering, the fighting, the conflicts, and we are restored to a peaceful directed wholeness.
Check out Paul's exhortation to the Ephesians:
"1I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, 2With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; 3Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4There is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in one hope of your calling; 5One Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6One God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all." (Ephesians 4:1-6)
Unity is in One Body, One Lord, One Baptism.
We are called to a Person, not to principles, not to ideas.
In Jesus, we find our rest and our relationship with everything else.
In Him, we find unity of heart as well as mind.
Consider Jesus warm consolation and promise to His disciples before His death on the Cross:
"Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me." (John 14:1)
Jesus used the plural "your", but mentioned one heart. Jesus gives us rest and He brings unity when we believe on Him.
Consider what Cleopas and his wife shared after the broke bread with Jesus, who had expounded to them everything concerning Himself in the Scriptures:
"And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?" (Luke 24: 32)
The couple spoke of one heart. Jesus brought them together!
This is how I have stayed out of the never-ending personal conflicts.
Jesus is my rest and my peace. I am called to a Person, Him who has been from the beginning (1 John 2:12)
When we see Him is our Leader, our Father--our Savior--much of the fleshly rancor falls away, and even when some people trespass against us, we do not fear to speak out against it, nor do we fear losing a person because they hold something dear to us that we cannot do without.
"For in him dwelleth all the fulness of the Godhead bodily." (Colossians 2:9)
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