Stop Looking at Yourself -- See His Perfect Love

The whole AA regime is centered around self.

I do not care how many times people pray "relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do thy will" found in the Third Step Prayer, because either Jesus Christ, in dying on the Cross, has set us free from ourselves, by taking s from dead in our trespasses, or He has not.

There is no grey, there is no maybe about the life of victory that He calls for us to live:

"Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us." (Romans 8: 37)

This love with which He loved us is a love that we need to grow in knowledge of:

"That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him:

"The eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints." (Ephesians 1: 17-18)

and then

"That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; 17That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, 18May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; 19And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God." (Ephesians 3: 16-19)

This love casts out every fear, through this love God can then give us beyond what we ask or think.

This love is Jesus dying on the Cross for our sins (1 John 4: 10), and so no wonder the Enemy spends a lot of time keeping people in bondage to the Law, keeping people occupied with themselves, keeping men and women caught up in the turmoil of choices and consequences which for God are no longer present to Him, since He has pledges that He will remember our sins no more!

Inventories, Fear, and the Truth

On our grudge list we set opposite each name our injuries. Was it our self-esteem, our security, our ambitions, our personal, or sex relations, which had been interfered with?

We were usually as definite as this example:

I'm resentful at:     The Cause            Affects my:Mr. Brown         His attention to my      Sex relations
                     wife.                 Self-esteem (fear)
                  Told my wife of my       Sex relations
                     mistress.             Self-esteem (fear)
                  Brown may get my job     Security
                    at the office.         Self-esteem (fear)Mrs. Jones        She's a nut -- she       Personal relation-
                     snubbed me.  She         ship. Self-esteem
                     committed her hus-       (fear)
                     band for drinking.
                     He's my friend
                     She's a gossip.My employer       Unreasonable -- Unjust   Self-esteem (fear)
                      -- Overbearing --       Security.
                     Threatens to fire
                     me for my drinking
                     and padding my
                     expense account.My wife           Misunderstands and       Pride -- Personal
                     nags.  Likes Brown.      sex relations --
                     Wants house put in       Security (fear)
                     her name. 

We went back through our lives. Nothing counted but thoroughness and honesty. When we were finished we considered it carefully.  (AA, pg 65)

 

This list is the classic reference in the AA Book.

 

The major theme, the major problem, for people who drink too much is "FEAR".

 

Yet the Word of God goes further, to the deeper cause:

 

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." (1 John 4: 18)

 

"Fear has torment" -- or "punishment" -- the sense within us of a "comeuppance" or a consequence for wrongdoing.

 

Yet Jesus Christ is the propitiation of our sins:

 

"And he is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world. " (1 John 2: 2)

 

Your sins and my sins were all in the future when Jesus died on the Cross, so we can safely say, just based on common sense, that all of our sins are forgiven, punished, paid for.

 

Yet since common sense is not so common, let us refer once again to the Word of God (from which even the AA Book insists on quoting, even if not in proper context of the One who is the Word!):

 

"But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. 8If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us." (1 John 1: 7-10)

 

Verse seven states that if we walk  in the Light - and that Light is God, not a mode of behavior or a line of thinking -- then Jesus' blood cleanses us, even now! Cleanses us from all sin, meaning that even if we wanted to take an inventory, as far as God is concerned, there is no sin, because we are in Christ, who is our righteousness and redemption (1 Corinthians 1: 30)

 

Now, John does not discount the truth that we have sin. If we say that we have sin, then and only then are we deceiving ourselves. Yet instead of trying to take account of our sins, we merely confess our sins, and God is both faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us (and this is an ongoing cleansing!) from all unrighteousness. This verse, coupled with all sin in 1 John 1: 7 makes it very clear -- we do not keep confessing our sin in order to maintain fellowship with God and our brethren in the Body of Christ!

 

Bill W. tell you to take your inventory and keep taking it. Jesus Christ, through His blood shed for your and the sins of the world, tells you that you are righteous, righteous, righteous in Him.

 

And if you are righteous in him, then there is no need fear punishment, since Jesus has fulfilled the law and all of its requirements against us! (Matthew 7: 14)

 

Indeed, we will know the Truth, and the Truth - that's Jesus! - will set us free!

Inventories, Fear, and God's Perfect Love

This struggle has been one of the greatest sources of trouble in my life, and I imagine the same is true for many people who have been taken through the AA wringer of inventories, confessions, and the rest.

I had a fear problem for the greater part of my life -- if I was jumpy about something, about anything, if I had a foreboding sense about life, I went with the "program" which made it my fault, and therefore something that I had to do something about:

Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code. (AA, pg 84)

Yet the Bible teaches that fear is not something that exists within the believer, per se, but is a Spirit:

"For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father." (Romans 8: 15)

and

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." (2 Timothy 1: 7)

Fear is a spirit, and thus we need the Spirit, which we receive by the Word of God, to deal with fear.

"It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life." (John 6: 63)

If we are trying to reason out our fears, then we are still trying to accomplish through our flesh what His love does:

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." (1 John 4: 18)

This perfect love is not something that we do, but something that God has done through His Son, who won the victory over sin and death at Calvary:
"Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins." (1 John 4: 10)

Yet it is "perfect love" that casts out fear. John completes this truth:

"Herein is our love made perfect, that we may have boldness in the day of judgment: because as he is, so are we in this world. " (1 John 4: 17)

This love has transformed us into sons of God, and we are growing more like Him:

"Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not." (1 John 3: 1)

and then

"Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is.

"And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure." (1 John 3: 2-3)

God's love, not our inventory taking, not our turning our thoughts resolutely toward helping others, not anything that we do, will remove fear from our lives!

God is love (1 John 4: 16), and His perfected love, not just toward us, but what this love turns us into, casts out every fear.

And how is "Jesus" now? He is not on a Cross dying, but sitting at the right hand of the Father, reigning:

"1If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. 3For ye are dead, and your life is hid with Christ in God. 4When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory." (Colossians 3: 1-4)

And

"For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him." (2 Corinthians 5: 21)

Instead of looking at ourselves, trying to think our way out of the fears in our lives, let us receive the righteousness that we have been made in Christ, and His righteousness and grace both enable us to reign in life (Romans 5: 17).

Forget the inventories, stop focusing on the fear, and let God's perfect love live in you!

"Continue to Watch. . ."? -- No Way!

This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code. (AA, pg. 84)

Ahem!

Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. 

What ever happened to "One Day at a Time?"

Continue to watch for . . .

This final phrase underscores the real contradiction. When I look over this passage now, with the full revelation that Jesus Christ is the propitiation for all of my sins, and the sins of the entire world, and for all time -- I cannot help but shudder.  A lifetime of taking my inventory, of looking over my shoulder, of pressing myself to make sure that in every way I measured up to some standard of goodness, when the Bible clearly teaches that no one is good, anyway, and that no one measures up to any standard.

Martin Luther got to the place where he went to the confessional every twenty minutes.

Pastor Joseph Prince of Singapore admitted that he would stop in between conversations and even in the middle of soccer games to confess every wrong thought, word, or deed that he had committed, so committed was he to "being right" with God!

I have had my fair share of these pains and sufferings, suffering with a conscience so evil, so full of the sense of sin, seared with this hot iron of condemnation, that I could never rest!

Thank God for the wonders of God's grace -- that He has thrown all our sins behind His back, that He does not remember them, that to God, everything is gone, gone, gone forever!

No more taking one's inventory, no more trying to keep oneself clean, for the Blood of Jesus keeps on cleansing us (1 John 1: 7)

May you receive this rest, may you receive this assurance now and forever that before God, you can never be anything but righteous, if you only believe!

"Continue to Watch" . . .? No Way! I'll let the Way, the Truth, and the Life show me, guide me, and give me all of His peace!

AA says "Take Your Inventory" -- Jesus says "Receive My Grace!"

No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. (AA, pg 84)

 

All the promises in Christ are "Yea and Amen"

 

"For all the promises of God in him are yea, and in him Amen, unto the glory of God by us." (2 Corinthians 1: 20)

 

The problem really settles on  --- do you believe Him or not?

 

Do you believe the following:

 

"1My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous: 2And he is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for the sins of the whole world." (1 John 2:1-2)

 

If you have entered the rest of Christ and His Finished Work, then indeed you accept that all has been paid for.

 

We are called to grow in grace and knowledge of the Lord (2 Peter 3: 18), to see more of all that He has done for us at the Cross.

 

We  must accept that not only has He died for our sins, He has taken away the curse (Galatians 3: 13) or the consequences of our sins. In His Body, all of our sins are sent away, and He refuses to remember them (Hebrews 8: 12).

 

Jesus Christ paid the price -- how, then, can we continue to "take our inventory" when all of our sins are forgiven, once and for all? He does not remember them, so what reason do we have to keep taking stock of our lives? In fact, the life that we now have in Him is His Life!

 

"I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me." (Galatians 2: 20)

 

This grace is a gift that He keeps on giving, which He wants us to keep receiving!

 

"for if by the offence of the one the death did reign through the one, much more those, who the abundance of the grace and of the free gift of the righteousness are receiving, in life shall reign through the one -- Jesus Christ." (Romans 5: 17, Youngs Literal Translation)

 

We are called not to take our inventories, but rather to keep receiving His grace:

 

"But not as the offence, so also is the free gift. For if through the offence of one many be dead, much more the grace of God, and the gift by grace, which is by one man, Jesus Christ, hath abounded unto many." (Romans 5: 15)

 

and

 

"Moreover the law entered, that the offence might abound. But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound:" (Romans 5: 20)

 

We need to receive more revelation of God's grace in our lives. In his epistles, Paul addresses his readers right away with "Grace and peace to you" Grace is something that we need to keep receiving, which is part of our "laboring to enter the rest" (Hebrews 4: 11). We rest in His righteousness, receive His grace, and by receiving His grace, we honor God all the more!

 

This "requirement" on our behalf may help explain why "forgiving" someone is not enough for some people. If we do not have the manifested revelation that God's grace is greater than our sin, that His blood keeps cleansing us (1 John 1: 7), then very easily we can slip back into working and earning and striving in our own effort for a number of things.

 

Satan attacks us with fears, worries, regrets, upsets, and the rest -- we are called instead to keep our eyes on Him who has justified us, and keeps justifying us (Colossians 3:1; Romans 8: 33)

 

Stop taking your inventory -- keep receiving His grace!

He Has Put Away All Wrongdoings!

Referring to our list again. Putting out of our minds the wrongs others had done, we resolutely looked for our own mistakes. Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? Though a situation had not been entirely our fault, we tried to disregard the other person involved entirely. Where were we to blame? The inventory was ours, not the other man's. When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight. (AA, pg 67)

This "list" business is a fool's errand before one puts pen to paper.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:" (Psalm 139: 23)

The Psalmist asked God to do the searching! Imagine that!:

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" (Jeremiah 17: 9)

Who can know it? Only God can! and in Christ, we then receive God's laws on our hearts and minds! (Hebrews 8: 10-12)

Micah prophesied what Jesus would do:

"He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea." (Micah 7: 19)

and this has been done forever in the New Covenant:

"For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more." (Hebrews 8: 12)

God remembers them NO MORE -- and this double negative is infinitely intensive -- no never!

If we feel a sense of guilt, or a sense of wrongdoing comes over us, we must rest in what has been done in His sacrifice, not our senses:

"For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that are sanctified." (Hebrews 10: 14)

and behold, the Holy Spirit then reminds us of the following:

"Whereof the Holy Ghost also is a witness to us: for after that he had said before,

"This is the covenant that I will make with them after those days, saith the Lord, I will put my laws into their hearts, and in their minds will I write them;

"And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more.

"Now where remission of these is, there is no more offering for sin. " (Hebrews 10: 15-18)

No more offering for sin - no more confessing, no more twisting oneself into a pretzel, no more doing dead works!

He has put away all our wrongdoings -- and thus we need not drink, smoke, or engage in any other perversion in order to break free! In Christ, we are free indeed (John 8: 36)

Forgiveness Based on His Blood, not our Mood

Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too. We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, "This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."

We avoid retaliation or argument. We wouldn't treat sick people that way. If we do, we destroy our chance of being helpful. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one. (AA, pg 67)

 

An attitude adjustment is simply not enough to overcome the hurts and pains that we have endured in our lives.

 

I remember one guy, Jack, who was still so bitter toward his dad after many years, fuming because his father had beaten his baby brother, while the little baby was still sleeping in his crib!

 

Another person very close to me, my mother, was still afflicted with intermittent rage against an abusive mother that she had endured for many years during her childhood. This woman's hurt still hit her conscience for many years, even after she had written her off in a note two years before she passed away, and many years after she was dead and buried.

 

Time does not heal all wounds, nor does taking one's inventory -- the blood of Jesus Christ alone shed for the remission of sins, of all sins, gives our conscience peace, not just for the sins that we have committed, but also for the wrongdoing that we have endured, for the bitter thoughts which the Enemy would like to tempt us with.

 

To just brush aside the hurts of other people does not satisfy a person's inner man. We need to know that our sins have been forgiven, and any upset in our lives afterward cannot break our fellowship with God, for He has given us an everlasting righteousness (Daniel 9: 24), the same righteousness as Jesus Christ, and this witness we receive at all times through the Holy Spirit, who convicts us of this righteousness!

 

Yet a man, a woman, a believer in the Body of Christ who believes that he has to confess his sins in order to maintain fellowhsip with God, well, that mars a man's mission on this earth. That creates a sin-conscience, a sense of never quite  measuring up, and our lives end up being about barely getting by, instead of enjoying life and that more abundantly!

 

A man who does not feel forgiven, who does not have a sense within himself that all of his sins are paid for, that all things are taken care of through the grace of God, will in turn feel bitter, demand revenge, and know no peace in his life. The parable of the unjust -- unmerciful -- steward best illustrates this. The king captured the steward who owed him an astronomically amount, but just before he sold him and all he had into slavery, he declared:

 

"The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all." (Matthew 18: 26)

 

The King forgave his debt, but the steward walked away with the sense that he had to pay the debt, or that he could pay it in his own effort. This man had no awareness that his sins were forgiven, so he hit up another steward, who owed him far less!

 

We have to have a conscience perfected, the knowledge and belief within us that all our sins are forgiven. When we have this expansive knowledge of God's grace, that He moves in our lives, that His grace is our life, we find that the harms that we have endured not only no longer have any power over us -- because our own sins no longer keep us in bondage -- but we find that His love overtakes any hurt that others would perpetrate against us.

 

We then no longer define ourselves by our feelings, nor by our thoughts, but we take God at His Word that we are a new Creation in Him, when we see Him greater than our past, present, and future, we find that His righteousness and grace explode in our lives, and we reign in Him!

 

However, we cannot enjoy a perfect conscience if we believe that we have to take our inventory every time that we sin, or at the end of every day. If we have to take our inventory, then we never have a sense of rest, and the hurts of others become magnified in our lives, as well!

 

For many years, I could  never understand why my mother could not let go of the upset in her lives. She would often complain that she was having bitter memories of people whom she had let go of many years ago. She would explode about people whom she had let go of, or of people whom she had reconciled with.

 

She even reminded me of things that I had done, and for a long time, I was in bondage to the wrongs that I had done. I also found myself giving a lot of credence to the things that other people were saying. More and more, I grew more sensitive and easily hurt because I was convinced that every time that I got angry or hurt, I had to do something about it.

 

But in Christ, I am not in bondage to sin or under law, but under grace, and so I reckon myself dead when I grow upset. I have no reason to hold a grudge, for His life and His glory fall on my life!

 

Forgiveness is based on His blood, not on my thoughts, not on my words, not on my feelings. It has nothing to do with me, and therefore I am free in Him, forever!